It’s that time of year again when I’m half way through a university course and I’m wishing it were over. There are differences though between pre-break and post-break modules and that’s lack of anxiety.
Before I took a break from studying I’d be a jibbering wreck at this point; obsession over scores, comparing myself with others especially anyone with a higher mark. I’d have convinced myself that I was an idiot to have even attempted to study.
Post-break I’m just simply bored. I went back into this with the sole purpose of completion. I have written (last week) that I would like to teach adult education and I do but I want to complete this degree and pass. After all once done it will have taken me 8 years! It’s a long time to be hitting the books.
There’s no anxiety though. Before I applied I accepted that my grades would be what ever they turn out to be. If it’s a low score I can be sad for a short while then move on. I stay away from forums and Facebook pages so I can’t compare and that in itself has made a massive difference. I no longer get annoyed at people asking questions that could be answered by simply logging onto their student account and having a look.
But yeah I’m bored. I picked the advanced creative writing course because I’d already read the PDF version of the course book and so could start some of the work early. Once I got the course materials I blasted through the assignments so I didn’t have the panic of completing them on time. They just need tweaking before submitting at the correct time. I may have organised myself into boredom because what do I do now?
The coursebook is quite bland. It’s designed to churn out identikit writers. There doesn’t feel like there’s any room for experimentation and I like to play. I like out-there ideas. But never mind it’ll soon be over.
I have a shorter level 1 course to fill in a credits gap then the big finish which will tax me. I should count my blessings that I have a ‘relaxing’ couple of years before the final year.
“Anyone who stops learning is old, whether at twenty or eighty. Anyone who keeps learning stays young.”
– Henry Ford
“Try not to have a good time…this is supposed to be educational.”
― Charles M. Schulz
“Real learning comes about when the competitive spirit has ceased.”
― Jiddu Krishnamurti