365 Day Blog challenge Day 186 Goddess #365daychallenge

Been a long day of people performance planning so it’s curling up time with a good book and relaxing. The meme below may be about being a Goddess but nothing wrong with the guys embracing their inner power either 🙂

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365 Day Blog challenge Day 185 Let’s Do This #365daychallenge

Let’s Do This…..

I’ve lost track of how many times I’ve said that this month.

‘I need to reduce my sugar intake again; Let’s do this’

‘I need to walk more; Let’s do this’

‘I need to restart my moisturising regime; Let’s do this’

And yet I haven’t done any of it. I really seem, after the brilliant start I had to this year to have lost motivation. I think about what I need to do then I’m not actually doing it.

I’m definitely at that self sabotage stage. I’m 2lbs off my next target and I know from past behaviour that when I get to significant targets I end up unconsciously putting up barriers to achieving this. I wrote some posts at the beginning of the year about the need to be invisible and that some of the sabotage was linked to this but I’ve taken lots of steps since then to combat that. I definitely think more about achieving goals than ever before.

One positive point this time is I am aware that I’m doing it. I’ve managed my inner battles with anxiety and self esteem to the point where my weight has stayed steady at the lower end rather than me gaining all over again so that is a huge plus point for this year. And another one; despite an increase in sugar I still haven’t had any chocolate so that is definitely one battle won.

I just need to work out that trigger to get me moving again.

I’ve had very little sugar this week but I have overcompensated with bread so I need to look at alternatives for boredom eating. Toast is not the answer J

I’m shopping at the weekend so will stock up on fruit and sugar-free jelly.

It’s a bank holiday and I have some walking plans. I still have those 5 minute exercise routines saved on my sky+ box but I have a tendency to forget they are there. I may have to set a reminder on my phone until it becomes habit to do it.

I’ve developed some good habits this year and got rid of some bad ones so I know it’s possible to do this. I also know from experience now that for all the messing about once I achieve the mini-targets the motivation comes back to go further and get at least ¾ of the way to the next one. I just need to find my missing mojo.

I will keep pushing on through and congratulating myself on achievements – being stuck now doesn’t negate the hard work and success that I already have

So again – Let’s Do This 🙂

365 Day Blog challenge Day 184 Motivational #365daychallenge

Today was the total opposite of yesterday. Well apart from rushing out of the house without a coat and nearly being late for a conference call but the rest has been good.

I had a meeting with my mentor who works in a building on the other side of the city centre. We went through the development course I am on and how it’s gone so far then discussed the different steps I want to look at next. She has made some contacts to introduce me to people in jobs I would like to explore so I can set up some shadowing.

Then we looked at the competencies needed for jobs. In the civil service this is the way they recruit and it can be a nightmare trying to give the best example of something you can to sell yourself in 250 words. I have a few already which she’s going to check and going forwards I have a few more to write so I have them to slot into any application. This is the hard part – doing them in the first place. She is going to sense check them and make sure they sell me as much as possible.

I left the meeting really motivated into my next steps. I have a few ideas of jobs I’d like to do and even though it’s never fun writing up competencies I have some good ideas to note down and build into something.

And it’s nice to have that time to just think about yourself and what you want and have a person to bat ideas off that can then help you explore what you really want.

Then I got to walk back to my office on a glorious sunny day. So today has been a good day 🙂

 

365 Day Blog challenge Day 180 Meaningful May: People #365daychallenge

According to tomorrow’s Action for Happiness Meaningful May calendar the action is to spend some face to face time with people who matter. Tomorrow is also the royal wedding and some big boxing event and the FA Cup football finals so I intend to avoid all social media where possible (except for writing this blog) and go hide in the woods or somewhere peaceful. So I did tomorrow’s action today.

My friend became a grandma 8 months ago. She invited myself and another friend to come and have a coffee and lunch with her and her daughters and the lovely baby. We all met in the coffee shop and just had a couple of hours with no intrusions from the real world. Lots of talk about the new baby and our grown up babies. Catching up on life.

Sometimes it’s good to switch off for a while, let go of life’s daily stresses and strains and focus on the good or in our case the little boy who is wanting to stand up and move and see everything with his innocent eyes.

So I’m totally at peace today. I’ve had a meaningful afternoon and am nice and chilled out. All fired up for ignoring the TV tomorrow 🙂

365 Day Blog challenge Day 177 Change of Plans #365daychallenge

I go back to work tomorrow after 6 sunshine filled days. I was meant to be having a long weekend in Ibiza, Spain after winning a competition but sadly it didn’t work out. I’ve posted numerous blogs on the state of my finances and despite hotel and most food paid for I couldn’t pay for the rest. Plus my passport is about to run out so I would have had to find the £85-ish to renew that first as well.

This is where I get fed up and my mood swings drop. I made the mess thanks to my mental health and I accept that and am taking steps to fix it. I’ve just under another 2 years left before I can be debt free. Most of the time I get by but sometimes I just want to be like everybody else and be spontaneous with trips.

My recently retired boss is on her 2nd holiday this year. Everyone around me is talking holidays even if it’s a week in this country. I’m desperately hoping that we get a bonus this year so I can look at the £99 2 day trips so I can have something. I know the next 2 years will fly by and I’ll be able to make up for everything I feel I miss out on now and I try not to have regrets as what’s done is done.

However lets be positive as that is what this blog page is all about. I could have spent the 6 days feeling sorry for myself and despite what the above paragraphs might say I haven’t done that. Instead I spent the time smashing my to-do list.

I painted the cupboard after saying I would for the last 18 months. I cleaned out the shed, I gave the garden two cuts and it’s now ready to be dug up so I can start looking towards the plans I have when the debts are paid. And I’ve finished and sent in my assignment 12 days early! Today I’ve done very little. I think I deserve at least one day just chilling and reading (although I did take advantage of the library 10p book sale – even my budget can’t argue with that amount)

Tomorrow is back to work although only for 2 days then it’s my weekend again.

365 Day Blog challenge Day 176 Starting Again #365daychallenge

I’ve noticed over the last couple of months that my sugar consumption is creeping up. I still haven’t had the chocolate and I’ve not had the fizzy drinks but I have had more biscuits than I should have and too many times I’ve ordered a cake or pastry when buying something in a shop.

Cutting it out as much as possible in January did wonders for my health and I obviously haven’t been paying enough attention to my behaviours for it to creep in again and I don’t want to keep making excuses to myself. I started the reduction of sugary products yesterday and keep thinking I need something sugary in the afternoons but I’m on leave from work for 6 days so I’m sure it’s just a boredom eating thing. I’m not hungry. I need to find more things to do!

The other thing I’ve let slip is a beauty regime. At one point I got myself into a really good routine of moisturising, using toners and so on and it’s lapsed. I keep saying I will do something about starting this again as it did help my skin but I haven’t. Again no excuses except my own laziness. So from tonight the creams are coming back out.

I remember at the beginning of the year watching something called Fat;The Fight of your Life or something similar. These people had often 10 or more stone to lose and first of all started off doing amazing then had a relapse. Some then picked themselves up and continued their journeys, some sadly gave up. At the time everything was going great for me so I couldn’t understand the lapse but now I can.

Magazines just tell you the success stories to sell whatever product they are peddling. They don’t tell you how hard it is to continuously carry on thinking about your weight, your body and what you need to do to change things. No one is perfect and set backs will happen. The key is whether you pick yourself up or give up. I refuse to give up so I have to accept that my journey won’t be perfect and every so often I’ll have to regroup and start again in some way. I’ve come so far though this year to stop now and for the first time in many, many years I don’t want to.

So new start, fresh start, onwards and upwards 🙂

365 Day Blog challenge Day 174 To-do lists #365daychallenge

I wrote a blog the other day that said I was rubbish at getting things done because I’m too laid back. It also mentioned that I was going to try and stick to the goals that I had committed to this month.

Well I have not only stuck to my goals but have completed them 2 weeks early! The grass is cut (and will need more work but I’ve at least done the bit I said I would), the cupboard has been de-cluttered and painted and I’ve cleaned out the shed. This then gives me lots of time to myself for the rest of May but also means I should probably start a to-do list for the garden.

I’ve still got 3 days left before I go back to work. I finished my story for my end of module university assignment and have roughly 300 words left to do of the commentary and my references so I’m even ahead of myself in that as it doesn’t need to be sent in for another 12 days.

I would like to say I will be really good at sticking to targets in future but I’d be lying. At the minute I’m just trying to harness the positivity and energy I have at the minute.